What makes a family healthy?

Parents who organize themselves in ways that empower them and their kids.

So how do we do that? Work harder? Work smarter? Work longer?


I chose this picture of the Avengers because even superheroes need to prioritize what it takes to effectively collaborate to overcome their challenges. "Civil War" was all about this.

United we stand; divided we fall. And there's no way we or our family members can be and do our best when we're divided. This is a profound, primary human challenge.

That which causes disintegration is brilliantly insidious. It commonly goes on right beneath our noses. Those who are naive and simple, think it's an external problem. "If people could just get it together, make the right choices..."

But the dilemma is not solved by blaming and judging others. It's mostly about dealing with the ongoing chatter in our heads and subterranean feelings in our hearts. Together they either dismantle our unity or liberate us to bond deeply. 

Working at our jobs will not empower us in this area.

Financial success and material wealth won't either.

It's what you pay most attention to.
It's what you feel most often.
It's what you do with your time to grow integration.

What we know and how it makes us feel determine decisions and actions. The thoughts, feelings, and actions that fill up our time profoundly affect our relationships and our souls. This is what creates cultures and cultures sustain conditions that impact and shape long-term growth and wellness for everyone in it. 

Because of all this, we need to develop and mature our organizing principle (o.p.). Whatever it is, it will determine how we manage these highly significant areas of life which result in the cultures we create.

What kind of culture has your organizing principle produced? Abdication? Over-protection? Domination? Or does it liberate everyone in your family to be and do their best?

Does your o.p. foster inspiration, creativity, innovation, intimacy, rest, recreation, meaningful collaboration? These are essential to solving the toughest problems that disintegrate our families and organizations.

Is your o.p. even your own? Maybe you simply adopted whatever was given you by your culture or family of origin. It's not uncommon to have downloaded it in your youth and never have even realized it's been running things. I've never found these to produce thriving results. More often than not, they are root sources of dysfunction. As such, they definitely don't do much empowering.

If your o.p. is binding you to fear, leaving you with anxiety and insecurity, causing you chronic stress, giving you an unhealthy body, and compromising your will, maybe it's time to ditch it.